{"id":14,"date":"2026-05-10T15:35:40","date_gmt":"2026-05-10T15:35:40","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/orlandorelocationreport.com\/?p=14"},"modified":"2026-05-10T15:35:40","modified_gmt":"2026-05-10T15:35:40","slug":"commentary-a-funny-thing-happened-on-the-way-to-the-trump-forum-pat-beall","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/orlandorelocationreport.com\/?p=14","title":{"rendered":"Commentary: A funny thing happened on the way to the Trump Forum | Pat Beall"},"content":{"rendered":"<div>\n<div>\n<p>Why yes, now that you mention it, the Titanic did have a ballroom. A big ballroom, the hottest ballroom on those high cold seas. More splendiferous even than the Kravitz Center ballroom, where the president recently took to a Forum Club of the Palm Beaches podium.<\/p>\n<p>Read more <a href=\"https:\/\/orlandorelocationreport.com\/?p=12\">Forget 2026 NBA draft lottery: A look back at Magic\u2019s historic success (luck?)<\/a><\/p>\n<p>Donald Trump has big plans for my little slice of paradise.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI give it the Mar-a-Lago treatment,\u201d he first chuckled of the Oval Office re-glitzing before turning his gaze on the crowd and making clear he wanted to make West Palm Beach better, too. Real estate agents whipped out their phones to put a hard sell on anything east of I-95. Prediction markets collapsed under the weight of Gold Sharpie bets.<\/p>\n<p>Or maybe I\u2019m needlessly hyperventilating over the prospect of a searingly gilded arch in my future. Sometimes it\u2019s hard to follow what Trump said, or meant, or thought, or forgot to mean or think. Sometimes that\u2019s because a stray thought so often crashes the party that is the presidential cranium, kicks over the keg and makes for the nearest exit. Sometimes it\u2019s because there are just so very many Trumps, as there were at the Forum Club speech.<\/p>\n<p>Donald Trump, Professional Greeter: \u201cThis is a crowd where I know so many \u2014 many killers. Some are nice. Some are horrendous people.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Donald Trump, Palm Beach Town Planner: \u201cI said (to the mayor), why can\u2019t we be more like a submarine?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Donald Trump, marriage counselor: \u201cOne policeman told me, \u2018My wife thought very little of me. She felt I wasn\u2019t a man because I was a bad investor. With my 401(k), I had nothing I could do about it. It was under the Biden administration.\u2019\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Donald Trump, sportswriter: \u201cI said, 250 years, OK, I got the Olympics, I got the World Cup. Maybe I can also claim the 250-year thing that I got that, too. So, I tried. I said, I also got 250 years. And they said, so you didn\u2019t get 200 with 250. OK, well, I gave up.\u201d<\/p>\n<div>\n<\/div>\n<p>Donald Trump, glass half full: \u201cSaturday night, it (White House Correspondents\u2019 Dinner) was good for one thing. People are loving my ballroom now \u2026 They love my ballroom. They love my ballroom.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Read more <a href=\"https:\/\/orlandorelocationreport.com\/?p=10\">Teen safety advocate reacts to teen takeover incident in Curtis Hixon Park, suggests solutions<\/a><\/p>\n<p>Donald Trump, quantum physics \u2018splainer: \u201cI do a lot of things that are impossible to do. Like becoming president three times.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Donald Trump, on wealthy Palm Beachers being diverted from Mar-a-Lago: \u201cThey get thrown around like pi\u00f1atas by the Secret Service. They don\u2019t mind. They\u2019re honored.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Donald Trump, graciously accepting audience questions: \u201cStupid question.\u201d<\/p>\n<div>\n<\/div>\n<p>Don\u2019t take my word for it. There are transcripts. There is video. And sadly for the subtle, there was a whole lotta brash Trump love for West Palm in that room, too; for the killers, for Palm Beach County Sheriff Ric Bradshaw, who Trump maybe-joked-not-joked had peeked at his ballot; for the well-heeled pi\u00f1atas of Worth Avenue; and especially for Palm Beach International Airport, soon to be Trump\u2019s International Wings O\u2019 Grift. Or, as Kamala Harris voters and Harry Potter readers refer to it, The Airport Which Must Not be Named.<\/p>\n<p>Trump may be smitten with the home team now, but that\u2019s only because FBI Director Kash \u201cStone Cold Sober\u201d Patel hasn\u2019t sent agents to see how very many seashells we have on our seashores. He\u2019s been busy counting his bespoke bottles of FBI-branded bourbon and indicting his predecessor Jim Comey, because: seashells. Specifically, carapaces spelling out 8647, which is either shell-speak for evil intent or a bartender telling Patel to 86 his personal booze and buy a drink already.<\/p>\n<p>And does the Secret Service know that there are 45 Palm Beach County addresses starting with 8647? Forty-five! The first term! Plus 8647! The conch conspiracy!<\/p>\n<p>Add in international sex symbol Warren Buffett and 250 years of football or maybe democracy or maybe mashed potatoes and you are well on your way to not understanding why our president ordered Pete Hegseth to grab \u2019em by the Strait of Hormuz.<\/p>\n<p>Maybe he thought his ships don\u2019t sink.<\/p>\n<p><em>Pat Beall is a Sun Sentinel columnist and editorial writer. Contact her at beall.news@gmail.com.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Read more <a href=\"https:\/\/orlandorelocationreport.com\/?p=1\">Hello world!<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Columnist Pat Beall parses the verbiage at President Trump&#8217;s appearance at West Palm Beach&#8217;s Kravis Center for a meeting of the Forum Club of the Palm Beaches.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":13,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[9,10],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-14","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-opinion","category-opinion-columnists"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Commentary: A funny thing happened on the way to the Trump Forum | Pat Beall - Orlando Relocation Report<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/orlandorelocationreport.com\/?p=14\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Commentary: A funny thing happened on the way to the Trump Forum | Pat Beall - 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