{"id":5209,"date":"2026-06-24T11:03:44","date_gmt":"2026-06-24T11:03:44","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/orlandorelocationreport.com\/?p=5209"},"modified":"2026-06-24T11:03:44","modified_gmt":"2026-06-24T11:03:44","slug":"asking-eric-my-longtime-friend-and-her-spouse-wont-take-a-10-mile-detour-to-visit-me","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/orlandorelocationreport.com\/?p=5209","title":{"rendered":"Asking Eric: My longtime friend and her spouse won\u2019t take a 10-mile detour to visit me"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Dear Eric<\/strong>: There is someone I have been friends with for more than 37 years. My husband and I moved to another state 12 years ago, but my friendship with this person has endured.<\/p>\n

Read more 4 Central Florida restaurants and a food truck shut down after health inspections last week<\/a><\/p>\n

She calls every weekday and we mostly talk about her family and her kids, et cetera. About six months ago, she was diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer\u2019s.<\/p>\n

For decades this friend has been a quilter, and one trip that has been on her bucket list for years has been to travel to \u201cQuilt City USA.\u201d<\/p>\n

Her husband had no interest in the trip, never prioritized it and basically ignored her requests to go. I felt bad for her, so while I am not a quilter, I eventually agreed to take her.<\/p>\n

I have since developed hard feelings toward the husband who never once acknowledged my efforts to spare him the time off work and expense of making this trip with his wife. The primary source of my hurt is that this friend and her husband travel at least once a year to the mountains less than 10 miles from where we now live, and some of their trips are for a couple of weeks at a time. I have always begged them to stop for a visit even if just for a half hour, and her husband can never be bothered to stop.<\/p>\n

They will be in the area again in August for two weeks, and I\u2019m ready to just tell my friend to please not mention to me when they are in the area because it hurts me so much that they refuse to come see us.<\/p>\n

If my friend didn\u2019t have this diagnosis, I feel I could easily let the long-distance friendship go. How do you recommend I go forward with this relationship, if at all?<\/p>\n

\u2013 Quitting the Quilter<\/em><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Dear Quitting<\/strong>: It sounds like you\u2019ve been a good friend to her. And with a less-than-supportive husband (to put it mildly), she needs a good friend.<\/p>\n

Although they share responsibility for never visiting you, it may be that she doesn\u2019t have as much autonomy in her relationship. Try to extend her some grace, especially since she\u2019s navigating this huge change in her life and her health. The husband\u2019s faults may be sending a message that doesn\u2019t reflect her true intentions.<\/p>\n

You might not get the visit you want but see if there\u2019s something to be gained from continuing your conversations and maintaining your friendship that way.<\/p>\n

Dear Eric<\/strong>: Four years ago, I invited a lady friend, her son and her granddaughter to move in with me and my roommate.<\/p>\n

Read more Windermere sues its residents over their boathouses \u2014 again<\/a><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

My son owned the house, and my lady friend and her son ended up talking me into letting her son buy the house from my son.<\/p>\n

Her son and I were to buy it together. But she said maybe it would be better to just only have his name on it so if something happened to me, he won\u2019t have to worry about getting my name off it.<\/p>\n

This year she informed me that they decided to sell the house and move back to Florida. She and I have been making the house payments as her son got fired at work for a drug test.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve been trying to get a worker\u2019s comp case settled so I can get a home built before they sell the place. I\u2019m in my 70s and really don\u2019t want to have to move into a rental and then move into a place I get built. What should I do?<\/p>\n

\u2013 Roommate Dilemma<\/em><\/p>\n

Dear Roommate<\/strong>: The way the house sale went down wasn\u2019t ideal. They may see you as simply renting from them, but from the way you describe it, the original plan was for you to be a co-owner of the house, and you\u2019ve made payments like one without the benefit of ownership.<\/p>\n

It would have been helpful to get an agreement in writing beforehand. But it may not be too late to work this out fairly. Talk to an attorney about your situation; they\u2019ll be able to analyze the specifics and advise you of your options.<\/p>\n

Short of that, the best solution may be to arrange to rent the home until your house is built. This would mean asking them to delay selling the house. They may not be able to afford to make their move without selling it, but it doesn\u2019t hurt to ask.<\/p>\n

You might also consider asking your son to help support you in this, as the former homeowner. He no longer has any right to this property, of course, but he might be able to help you fill in some financial or logistical gaps while the other pieces, like the workers comp and the construction of the new home, get sorted.<\/p>\n

Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at eric@askingeric.com or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram @oureric and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com.<\/em><\/p>\n

Read more Miss Manners: This \u2018chic\u2019 name trend is popular, but problematic<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It hurts me so much that my friend and her husband refuse to come see me amid her diagnosis.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":397,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[15],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5209","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-advice"],"yoast_head":"\nAsking Eric: My longtime friend and her spouse won\u2019t take a 10-mile detour to visit me - Orlando Relocation Report<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/orlandorelocationreport.com\/?p=5209\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Asking Eric: My longtime friend and her spouse won\u2019t take a 10-mile detour to visit me - 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